I keep trying

I want the pain to stop.

My chest hurts.

Sometimes I can’t breathe.

I’m exhausted, I just want to curl up and close my eyes.

I cry. A lot. Sometimes I don’t even know why.

Everything that happens is magnified. Everything hurts so much more.

Everything seems like an ending. Everything is so final. I feel like everything is slipping away. Getting out of reach.

I don’t feel in control of anything. I feel weak.

I am afraid.

I am afraid that I am not strong enough to keep moving forward. To work through everything that is all so overwhelming.

I try to focus on one thing at a time but I can’t block out everything after that one thing.

I am trying. I keep trying.

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